Vasool Hai Kya ??

Lately I am being exposed to a lot of heat..and this heat aint just form the Sun …it’s the heat from the Bling that couple of ppl I know , and couple whom I would like to know , are investing in..

They say that if u get up early in the morning and do the suryanamaskar  , in front of the sun (how very obvious from the name ) u are exposed to good vitamins and this and that etc..Which keeps you healthy..

But when you are exposed to the same damn sun in the middle of the day, it harmful cause its shinning to brightly and the whole UV ray, ozone layer and the blah blah…but wait a minute if its health to be exposed to the same thing in morning shouldn’t it me more healthy at 12 in the noon…what the f(beep)k…it’s too confusing for my 1406gms brain to understand.

Well coming back to the topic “Vasool Hai Kya??”, These pieces of bling that these people have invested in are equally confusing to me..and no I just for the record I aren’t a blonde.

For eg the other day I was travelling with this friend of mine who recently bought a watch..a watch that tells time and nothing more..but it cost him a bomb , and by a bomb I mean Bloody 6 figures. Its known as the Franck Mullers - Crazy Hours Color Dreams..now the reason behind not replacing the beaten up santro with a new swift , but using the money to buy a watch – “dude it’s a Franck Muller , they are the masters of complication” . so what so complicated in a watch ..well u see the nos. in the watch are not where they should be (as shown in the image) but it show the right time…u must be thinking is me kya complication ,ye to c(beep)a bana ne ka dhanda hai ..well no the complication is the hour hand points at the correct no. so if its 3 ‘o’ clock , the hour hand will be pointing at three but the minute hand pointing at where a 12 is in a Titan. So now you think it’s worth it..but now the master of complication has made his life more complicated. He has a huge collection of such exclusive time pieces but only this one is complicated. What happens is he is not use to reading the time the way Mr. Franck reads hence he guff ups..misses his appointments , doesn’t reach on time and also if someone inquires the time often miss guides them too. He has really got badly screwed up because of this. Now he has does wear his Franck but prefers to use his BlaackBerry to tell time..but no doubt his watch does draw some attention and specially from people who are familiar with the masters of complication. The funny part is the reaction from people alien to Mullers, they tell him that he has been duped, the numbers in the watch are not in their place..(I was one of them)  so u tell me “vasool hai kya ???’

Second eg – the Virtue phone – horribly expensive as it has the best of the stones and the skin and they don’t sell too many of them. They cost six figures and when it comes to features they are as good as the 3k nokia phones. A friend of mine again born with a gold spoon in his mouth and mind you this one was limited edition (spoon), is a proud owner of a Ferrari edition virtue. Now this guy has a BB , a communicator and now his dad buys him a vertue cause his son is a Ferrari fan (mind u his dad can actually buy him a real Ferrari).

So this one day we go to his farm house (100+km from bbay) to play night cricket, though I am not a cricket guy at all, the idea of playing cricket under a heavy influence of alcohol excited me. Hence we reach his farmhouse and we get into our sportswear. Suddenly he tosses his jeans over to me (to put it in his duffel bag, placed next to where I was) and I am hit….”what was that !!!” is the expression written all over me..something very heavy hit me..and demins aren’t suppose to be this way. “are mera phone jeans me rehe gaya hai , nikal dena “ he shouts..i put my hand in it and out comes a Red leather wrapped vertue which reminded me of the 3-4 kg dumbbells in my gym.  VERTUE !!!! I exclaimed and quick came a reply no its not VERTUE its VERTU (ver+2). So being myself a started playing with it just to find out that my 6610 was as good as the vertu when it came to the software part.

So I asked him why buy a phone which is featureless and pay two months’ rent for an apartment in JUHU.. “arree boss Ferrari hai”(2 small horses on the phone) and its made of carbon fiber so its light ( ya right , its 3kgs instead of 3.2kgs) it’s got the screen on the phone display is Crystal which is scratch proof and buttons are made of stainless steel.. but wait a minute why du need a scratch proof display , u are going to take care of the phones not that u are going to play cricket with it  or try to light flint stones. So we went into a heated argument as to whether is it worth it ???..He said “boss in our business u need to flaunt it” I said “buy a 8800”..he said – I said , he said – I said , and it went on..Finally I said dude it looks like you have pumped up ur biceps weight lifting the phone, just as he was about to comeback a Milan chewing - don’t care a shit – friend of our interrupted ‘ abe who do lakh Rs. Ka body guard hai..koi panga hua to utha ke sir pe maro to samne wala mar jayega.. aur socho public kya bolegi kya shaan se mara” . .to which we both went quite, my vertu owner friend picked up his phone and made sure he hid it from our Milan chewing friend…cause he was in the opposite team and we often get into heated arguments… so vertu “vasool hai kya?”

There are a lot of such examples people going to 5 star restaurants, Fashion Labels , lot of hi-end electronics , accessories etc, so the question is are they all worth it.. even cars for that matter I know of a certain Guajarati gentleman , who was head over heels for a Bmw when he drove one in Uk. He came back to Bombay and headed to the Bmw showroom next day itself. But ended buying a Mercedes…why..heres why , he ordered a top of the line 5 series and went home happy with a brochure ( to show it to his bapuji)..on the way he found out that the 50+lakh car doesn’t have a spare tire ..(Bmws have Run Flats).Outraged by the thought that a fifty lakh car with no spare wheel where as his maruti has it he canceled the Beemer and got himself a pointed star ( they come with a spare wheel)..

So what is this...is complication meant for all..is expensive complicated..is complication expensive ..Or is the new tech making things too expensive and complicated..or is it only show off value..What is all this where are we heading..Where are we coming from...where are we going to land up...chalo..Now got to go..Need to work, make money to buy a Franck Muller, Vertu (waiting for 1 with 2 bulls) and a Beemer…